Meeting Xion

So its Wed night/Thurs morn 5-1-08.

Xion was born Tuesday 4-29-08
I call him my little alien baby.

He was 8 inches long and weighed 4.6 oz.

I was so blessed that he came out in one piece.
I have heard stories about babies that came out in pieces.
He was still intact in his sac when he passed through my cirvex.

I went in to The Woodlands Memorial Herman Hospital on Tuesday at 6am
They gave us a room and we waited.

At 7:05am they came in and gave me 4 pills of Cytotec vaginally.

We waited around and watched painful TV (the boys made me watch Saved by the Bell and Lilo and Stitch).

The boys fell asleep around 8:30am

My mother called on monday
I had told her a few weeks earlier that I was going to need her to watch them when I deliver and to please keep her schedule open. Im not sure what she heard me say but for some reason she called me almost every day for three weeks to tell me
1. Im going to the store if you need me
2. Im home now if you need me
3. Im going to step out for a few hours if you need me
yada yada yada

I didnt get my hopes up cause well........ shes my mother and shes not very bright or dependable.

So monday (she knew i was going in on tuesday) she calls and said.... Patty (its always Patty) and I have to take the van to the shop on tuesday so we will be "out of pocket" all day. But you know I remember how when Cody was born you wanted me to leave you alone (she was talking to me and asking questions while I was 14 hours into labor with NO MEDS!) so I guess you wont be needing me tomorrow."

I was just like.... yeah thats fine mom.
Im used to her letting me down.

So I went home and thought.... well Ill just keep them up all night that way they will sleep all day at the hospital. Which is what happened and caused another problem (lol) that Cody rescued us from. (more on that later)

So the boys fell asleep around 830
they gave me another dose of 4 pills at 11:05 and said... the second dose is usually what does it.

YEAH RIGHT
they dont know my stubborn cirvex.

3 hours later - nothing.
Im still sitting up
napping here and there ( I had stayed up with the boys)
and being bored
(they blocked myspace at the hospital so I lost communication with most of my closest friends...im not a phone person lol)

Anna came by on her lunch break and bought me some awesome flowers.

I kept going back and fourth between having shivering chills and not being able to get warm enough and then hot flashes where im hot and sweating and rubbing cold rags on my skin to stay cool.



so at 3:05 I get a third dose.
It wasnt until 3:50 I got what finally felt like the beginning of labor.
The boys were still passed out so I tried to sleep through most of it.
Around 4:50 it was hurting pretty bad so they gave me a pain med called newbane or something and dude..... I was feeling fine in like 10 minutes.
All warm and fuzzy and stupid.

Dr. Rawson poked his head in right about the time I was feeling that "I got to push" feeling and checked me and was like... Oh were done.

I was like what?

At some point Xion had passed through my cervix and was sitting in my birth canal.

So they got things ready at at 5:12 Xion was born.
Oddly & painfully enough NO ONE looked at the clock except me.
Not the dr or the nurses or Lance noted the exact time he was born.
:-(
That makes me VERY sad.

He worked on getting the placenta and stuff and it was all over at 5:25 and I got a shot of methergen that is supposed to slow down the bleeding.

They cleaned me up and brought him back in around 6 and we spent an hour taking pictures of him.
Brittani came and hung out and took some pix too.

Then we put him on his little pillow, told him goodbye, and daddy took him back to the nurses.

It didnt really bother me all that much until the goodbye.
I guess there is a part of us that are happy to have them, play with them, take pictures, talk to them even though they are gone. Even carrying him deceased was somewhat comforting.
It sucks to think... ok... hes gone forever now.
No more seeing him or talking to him
What makes us think they can hear us anyway.

I know Ill get to see him in heaven. But I want him now, I want them now.
Id so much rather be pulling my hair out with 4 kids under 10 than having Jesus baby sit two of them
But I know He knows best so......... im not going to question that.
That leads to the bad place and I aint going there.

Last night was a long night.

At first they were like..... oh youll get to leave about 2 hours after you deliver.
Then they were like......... yeah were going to keep you for the night.

I think that was because
1. I bled ALOT.
2. Checking my heart Brandy found a heart murmer. Yeah....... seems it was going ....wump wump wump pause wump wump wump. So they scheduled an EKG which was HORRIBLE and I didnt like at all and will NEVER do that again.

So I was like
im tired
lance is tired
and the boys woke up around 5pm.

AWESOME (sarcastically) :-/

So here comes Cody to the rescue. Couldnt hurt to ask right?
Cody can you please come to the hospital, take the car and your brothers, take them home and stay up with them allllll night long even though you just got off work and have to work again tomorrow at 4?

Sure mom. He was totally ok with it and happy to help and that blesses me so much.
Hes not a perfect kid but hes a good kid and he has a good heart and most importantly hes MY kid. My FIRST baby. And for 10 years before Lance he was my main man and kept me going and the reason I made good decisions. Arent kids great for that?
Growing you up?
Making you chose the better roads?
I mean you do it for them, but you get all the blessing from it.

My whole reason to stop dating losers was Cody.
I needed a good man for my son.
A man who loved Jesus.
A man who would never abandon my child.
I was an adult. I had been cheated on and lied to and left before. I could deal with it.
But I didnt want to let Cody become attached to someone who would hurt him.
So I chose Lance.
HAHA..yeah right. GOD chose Lance for us.
:-D

Sorry im getting off track.
Cody came, got them, took them to walmart and got food that mom doesnt let them eat (Trevan later said that was the best part) and they went home and played. At one point I called to check on them and Grant TIRED to tell on Cody but Cody was being silly and Grant couldnt tell on him for laughing and all I could hear was all three of them laughing so thats good.

I got off the phone and believe it or not could not sleep.
I missed my kids.
I mean, im with them 24/7
my back hurt
and I was bored.

I didnt fall asleep until between 4 and 5.
and of course when I did they came in to get vitals and take blood.
fun!!! :-/

They let me go home about 9am
and I came home and crashed.

We had two great nurses Irma and Vanessa most the time and the night nurse was Brandy who was also amazing and sweet!

Overall it went well and I know it was because so many of you guys were praying.
Thank you so much for your prayers and intercessions.

So thats the story of baby Xion who is in heaven with his big sister Treya who would be 1 year and 8 months old, my big brother who was my best friend for 10 years, and our Jesus.

He is in the process of being cremated and will be back home soon to sit on the shelf with his sister in my room.

We will most likely have a memorial at our house like we did for Treya so keep checking in for updates on that if you want to come over.

Thank you for reading and more importantly thank you for caring and for any tears you have willfully given up for me and my baby. I hope our story somehow helps you with yours.

Much much love and blessings
Stacy

Pictures of Xion